I haven’t been on here or facebook since last Friday…. between the computer issues i have been having (computer kept trying to auto update then restarting every time I tried to use it from Friday till Tuesday), and the mental break down that started about Monday till I just let it all out yesterday and had a hard cry that lasted about two hours… I just couldn’t bring myself to get on-line. when things start stackin up inside I tend to start to shut down and not engage with anyone more than is absolutely necessary (I take care of my mommy duties and that’s about it). I know it’s not healthy to do that but it just happens sometimes. I know it’s the begining of winter here in Minnesota (we got dumped with over a foot of it from Saturday night through Sunday night) and the start of the winter blues, pile that on top of the already stressful situation of our housing situation and I just lost it for a few days. But thankfully my Hubby let me unload it all last night to him (and I feel bad that I did, but very thankful I have him and that he lets me do that when I need to). So today I feel better and my mental load feels a little lighter.
I am a routine person and since we moved we haven’t been able to establish a daily family routine like we had before. I know everyone keeps telling me to go with the flow and I have really tried and it just isn’t working. I feel so disorganized everyday!
The other thing that I think helped fester my mental stress was the all day, every day constant checking of the different media that has homes for rent in the areas we would like to move to. And each time the same thing… NOTHING available. Well nothing that is big enough or affordable for a working class family of 5 with a dog, two cats and smoking adults! oh and that is NOT in the cities. As I read all the for rent ads its like they want a robotic couple (no kids, no animals, no smoking, no life) to rent these places. it makes my blood pressure just rise even typing about it!
Ok enough venting! i could go on an on for a long time and all that would do is get me all in a tither again.
I am back again 🙂 can’t promise I wont need to take a mental break again but hopefully it wont be for a while again.